Drunk Words are Sober Thoughts
by RozalinaAlexandra
Summary: Naruto desperately wants to go to Kiba's party for the chance to hook up with his long-time crush Sakura, but the pinkette will only go if Sasuke attends. The catch? Sasuke has an unholy infatuation with Naruto. AU Oneshot SasuNaru


**Author's Note: This is a quick one shot that I wrote inspired by the quote "drunk words are sober thoughts". Also I figured this could aid my desperate need for the creativity to finish Threads. It's not all that serious, just meant to be lighthearted and funny. Anyways I hope you enjoy. x**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.**

 **Warning: Occasional use of expletives and suggestive themes. BoyxBoy so if you don't like that, then simply don't read.**

Sasuke sat in his room looking over the history notes again, a deep scowl marring his unblemished face as he did. The dark haired teenager had reviewed them so many times that he was 100% positive he could recite them like lines from a monologue.

 _So much for a distraction,_ he thought, placing the papers down onto the mattress in front of him.

Sighing loudly, he threw the weight of his body back into the bed, glancing up at the ceiling. Unsure of what to do or where to go, he let his eyes fall closed in a silent vexation for his lack of a social life. It was Friday night after all.

"Ugh," he groaned, running an ivory colored hand down his face. And almost an instant later, a resounding knock on the door forced him to get up. Grumbling and cursing the Gods, he trudged to the door openly it slowly. Sasuke was soon met with his older brother's smirking face, much to his dismay.

"Phone call," Itachi said simply, holding out the house phone to his younger brother. Sasuke went to retrieve it, only to have it pulled out of his reach just as fast.

Sasuke glared daggers at his brother; as an unfazed Itachi laughed loudly in response. Having had his fun, he dropped the phone into the younger Uchiha's waiting, outstretched hand. Then turned on his heel and left the room.

The teenager stared at the phone for a second before reluctantly bringing the receiver up to his ear, "Hello?" he muttered.

"SASUKE, WHAT THE FUCK? I called you SEVEN times!"

Sasuke tried to ignore the unusual feeling that started in his chest and subsided deep in the pit of his stomach at the sound of Naruto's raspy voice. The Uchiha found that it didn't matter if Naruto was angry or happy, the sound of his voice always had the same effect on him. The abnormal quickened pace of his heart, and the unsettling feeling of nausea.

"What do you want Naruto?" Sasuke asked indifferently, keeping his tone as monotonous as possible, to elude the true excitement he felt when speaking with the blond idiot.

"Well," Naruto began, "Kiba is having a party, and I asked Sakura, but she said that she wouldn't come unless you did. So how 'bout it bastard?"

A deep grimace find itself at home on Sasuke's pale face at the sound of Sakura's name. The last thing the Uchiha wanted to do was go to a party with people. So why would he want to go to a party that Sakura was attending. The pinkette was his number one fan girl, incessant and irritating.

He sighed loudly, weighing out his options. He idly decided that dealing with Sakura was worth it, so long as he got to see Naruto. Shoving the real reason as to why that fact was true to the back of his mind, he replied, "Fine whatever, when is it?"

A sigh of relief could be heard loudly through the other end of the phone. Sasuke wondered if Naruto had been waiting for his decision with bated breaths.

"Thanks bastard! It starts at 8, be ready by then. Bye!"

Sasuke dropped the phone onto the bed next to him, his hand gripping at the mattress as he tried to calm his drastically increased heartrate. He didn't understand why he felt…anxious? It wasn't as if he had never gone to a party with Naruto before, yet for some reason he felt the nerves forming.

With a long, dramatic, exhale, Sasuke slowly stood, his bare feet padding against the wooden floors as he made his way to the restroom to take a much needed shower. Once out in the hallway, he found that he wasn't safe from the wrath of his older brother as Itachi physically blocked him from going into the bathroom.

"Move Itachi," Sasuke grit out, grinding his straight white teeth together in justified annoyance.

"So who was that Sasuke?" Said brother interrogated with a knowing smirk, completely ignoring his younger brother's orders.

Sasuke narrowed his obsidian orbs into slits, refusing to answer the nosy question.

"Just fucking move," he spat, his voice dripping with malice.

Itachi's smirk widened as he leaned his form up against the frame, the sole of his left foot resting easily on the door with his slender arms crossed coolly over his chest. Not at all fazed by the death glares his younger brother was shooting his way, he mockingly replied, "If you answer my question, I'll think about it."

Sasuke clenched and unclenched his jaw. He was not in the mood for Itachi's childish games, but he needed to bathe. He trained his coal black eyes on the floor before muttering "A friend," under his breath.

Appeased with the answer, Itachi pushed himself up off of the door and basically danced over to Sasuke with practiced ease, closing the distance between them. With his two long fingers poised and ready, he jammed them into the dead center of Sasuke's forehead, leaving a red mark in their wake.

Sasuke flinched at the jab and when he felt the rough pads of Itachi's fingers brush his skin. He attempted to soothe his abused forehead while looking up to fix his glare on his slightly taller sibling; mentally damning him to Hell.

The older Uchiha's face held all of the amusement that he felt at Sasuke's discomfort proudly, before he bumped their shoulders together as he passed, taunting his younger brother one last time before retreating into what Sasuke so politely referred to as his lair.

"Or more than one," Itachi cryptically added in a _very_ condescending tone.

Sasuke's ivory complexion flushed to the color of his favorite vegetable as he quickly rushed into the bathroom, slamming the door hastily behind him.

The freshly bathed teenager cautiously opened the door, the steam from his scalded hot shower billowing out as soon as he did. After a quick survey of his surroundings, he deemed it safe to exit and he wasted no time in getting to his bedroom to quickly avoid another catastrophic run in with his sadistic bastard of a brother.

He walked to his closet with a black towel wrapped loosely around his hips. Water pooling at his feet as he rifled through his clothes to find something suitable to wear. He settled on a pair of well-fitting khaki colored pants, a charcoal grey Santa Cruz t-shirt, and his black and white Nike windbreaker. After slipping on his immaculate white vans, he checked himself out in the body length mirror bolted to the back of his bedroom door. Satisfied with his outfit, he applied his lotion and cologne and then went to accomplish the daunting task of styling his hair.

Finally ready, Sasuke reclined on his bed lazily, checking the time on his gold Nixon watch. With disdain he found that it was only 7 o'clock and he still had another hour to go before Naruto would even show up. All the while trying to disregard the growing impatience he had for his best friend's arrival.

The dark haired teen groaned audibly, snatching a novel up off of his nightstand in a fruitless attempt to distract himself. At some point or another he had grown tired of the book, and with drooping eyelids, he drifted off into sleep.

The sound of Sasuke's doorbell ringing repeatedly woke him up with a start. He clutched his chest and glanced at the alarm clock, finding that it read 8:20 pm in green iridescent numbers. He jumped out of bed, throwing his covers carelessly off and onto the floor before practically running to answer the front door before Itachi could get to it.

Sasuke opened it to reveal a very annoyed looking Naruto. Azure orbs met black in a heated glare, and Naruto playfully raised his fist as though he were about to hit his stoic friend. Although Sasuke's #1 fan Sakura, had trapped Naruto's tan arm in a grid iron lock and glared vehemently at the blond haired idiot.

With a short greeting to the pair and an exaggerated eye roll, Sasuke bit back an exasperated sigh as he followed the two out to the car. The pink haired demon began one of her very long lectures as to why Naruto should _never_ touch "her" Sasuke, and all the while shooting said boy flirtatious glances. Sasuke would have been mildly impressed by her ability to multitask if the reason for it hadn't been so horrendously nauseating. Really, he could have puked.

After the headache inducing car ride, the three _finally_ made it to Kiba's house. Sasuke couldn't escape from the car any faster, as he practically sprinted from the vehicle as soon as Naruto had put it in park.

Not bothering to wait for the other two, Sasuke languidly walked up the steps to Kiba's porch. Sasuke paused at the door, deciding to wait for the arguing pair to catch up. He looked down and snorted at the doormat that read "WIPE YOUR PAWS" adorned with dirty paw prints to boot. Typical.

Upon entering, the young Uchiha quickly realized that the environment was overwhelming to say the least. The music was blaring so loudly that he was pretty sure he wouldn't be able to hear properly in the morning. Though that was the least of his worries, he'd decided. Taking in his surroundings and finally noticing that every single girl at the party was now staring at him with the most desperate looking expressions he'd ever seen. Though he presumed it was their attempt at looking cute.

Apparently he wasn't the only one to have detected this, because within seconds Sakura had pushed herself closer to Sasuke, glaring at any banshee that thought she had a chance with _her_ man.

Sasuke grit his teeth at this realization, but with the small house so jam-packed with people, there wasn't much that he could do to prevent it.

With the pale teen occupied with a certain pink haired girl, Naruto took his time to walk around the room, greeting every single person he saw with a blinding grin. Sasuke's eyes were trained on Naruto, following all of the blond boy's movement, a small smile creeping its way onto his normally complacent face. Naruto was a ray of sunshine, having the ability to brighten anyone's mood, even the very smug and hardened Uchiha Sasuke.

As the night continued, Sasuke found himself draped lazily on a couch as he watched with rapt attention (and disgust) as Naruto repeatedly made an effort to "score" with Sakura. Regardless of his vain attempts, Sasuke still found an unearthly amount of jealously coiling in the pit of his stomach. The teen realized that maybe Itachi was right.

No longer wanting to watch his friend make a fool out of himself, he fled to the kitchen to get something to drink. Not paying any mind to the fact that consuming alcohol in that state of mind wasn't a good idea at all.

A couple of hours, and more than a few drinks later, Sasuke could be found sitting in the backyard with Naruto to his right, and a sleeping Shikamaru (God only knows how) to his left. Sakura, Kiba, and Ino were all sitting across from them, all five teens taking shots. Though the reason why Sasuke was still drinking, he couldn't say.

By 12 am he was completely inebriated, he more than likely should have stopped drinking at least an hour ago, yet there he was, sipping slowly from his rum and coke, with a cigarette held loosely in his other hand.

Naruto was in the exact same boat as Sasuke. Sitting, or swaying rather, right next to his pale friend. Naruto had his pants rolled up to his knees while his bare feet to his shins were submerged in Kiba's pool. His arms behind him to support his weight.

Sasuke took a drag from his cigarette, and Naruto took a swig from his beer. Then all too suddenly the blond was leaning his head against Sasuke's shoulder.

Sasuke didn't protest the contact like he normally would have since he was too drunk to remember why he didn't like physical interaction in the first place. As if emphasizing this point, he encouraged the action by placing a muscular arm around his tanned friend's broad shoulders.

Sasuke stubbed out his finished cigarette, rolling his eyes as Naruto began talking about Sakura. Again.

"I-I don't know. She's just so pretty!" the idiot exclaimed, slurring his words slightly.

Sasuke sighed, biting his tongue before he openly admitted how much he disliked the girl. This had been Naruto's fourth outburst about the pink-haired girl and Sasuke wasn't sure how much longer he could handle it. He figured the universe must be testing him.

"Teme are you listening to me?" Naruto inquired, glaring at his friend accusingly.

"Trying not to," Sasuke admitted easily, finally fed up with Naruto's never-ending ramblings about his fangirl.

It might have been the alcohol, or just the jealousy that got the best of him, but Sasuke pushed Naruto off of him, steadying his body before turning to fully face the very confused blond. The look that Naruto was giving him made his stomach flip, and if he'd had any more to drink then he probably would have thrown up everything he'd consumed that night. No questions asked.

"Why don't you want to talk about Sakura?" Naruto asked.

Sasuke stared at him liked he'd asked the stupidest question in the world, and shook his head slowly.

"Idiot," Sasuke began moving closer to the blond, and cupping his hand to one of his tan cheeks. "I like you," Sasuke muttered, idly aware that he would have never admitted this without the liquid courage.

"S-Sasuke, what are you saying?" Naruto whispered, his face a nice shade of pink at this point.

Sasuke didn't answer verbally, instead allowing the slight upturn of his lips into small, but rare, smile; as he moved his thumb around Naruto's whiskered cheek affectionately.

Sasuke wasn't sure when they had gotten this close, but Naruto's warm and shaky breaths fanned out over his pale face. The smell was a mixture of something vaguely citrusy with the faint scent of lingering alcohol. Purely intoxicating, Sasuke found as he closed the distance between them, capturing the blond teen's slightly chapped lips in a tentative kiss.

Naruto stiffened beneath his lips, and discouraged, Sasuke began to pull back. Instantaneously, one tan arm snaked its way behind the back of a pale neck and pulled the other into a deeper kiss. Sasuke was smirking against Naruto's lips as his rough fingers fisted into the silky black tresses. Their lips moving together passionately, while Naruto seemed to be literally vibrating with excitement.

Sasuke felt the gentle sensation of Naruto's tongue prodding at his bottom lip, pleading for an entrance. Complying lazily with the request, the blond was surprised when Sasuke's own pink appendage began wrestling with his for dominance.

The young Uchiha was in unadulterated euphoria, but all good things must come to end, he realized as his moment of ecstasy was suddenly shattered by the most disturbing squeal. Reluctantly breaking the kiss, his black eyes searched for the source of the interruption. His gaze fell upon three people standing by Kiba's sliding door, or two standing rather. Considering Sakura had fainted shortly after breaking his eardrums.

Sasuke rolled his eyes for what felt like the millionth time that night alone, and he glared at the two other figures who were still nosily watching him. There he found Shikamaru standing with an amused expression, and Kiba looking pretty annoyed.

"Pay up," Shikamaru murmured lazily, sticking his hand out towards Kiba.

Kiba groaned, then said, or more appropriately, whined, "Fuck Naruto! You cost me $50!"

The mutt hastily reached into his pockets and fished out his wallet, grabbing the bills from before rudely shoving the money over to Shikamaru.

Naruto's cheeks were a deep red as he shot a shy, sideways glance at Sasuke. "T-They bet on us making out?" he asked.

Sasuke shrugged, wondering if he had really made his interest in Naruto that obvious.

Said person's blush traveled from his face, passed his neck, all the way down to his collarbone, while he tried to look at anything but Sasuke's face.

Half expecting Naruto to get up and walk away from him, Sasuke was shocked when he instead found cerulean eyes once again gazing at him with a curious look.

Sensing Sasuke's astonishment, Naruto extended a caramel complexioned hand, which the other teen gratefully took. Naruto pulled them up off the floor, leaving his dirty tennis shoes discarded by the pool as he led the pair into the house.

"Where are we going?" Sasuke inquired nonchalantly, as he allowed himself to be dragged without so much as a protest.

Naruto looked back at Sasuke, an arrogant smirk adorning his usually innocent face. "Wow," he began, not bothering to mask the amusement in his voice, "You want me to fuck you in front of all of these people? 'Cause I'd gladly comply."

A blush tinted alabaster skin at Naruto's words, but as soon as Sasuke heard the raspy chuckle escape from the other's mouth, he actually processed what the smug blond had said.

Sasuke pulled Naruto into Kiba's bedroom and locked the door behind himself. Immediately pushing the blond down onto the bed, before getting on top and effortlessly trapping Naruto beneath him.

Naruto squirmed with anticipation at the predatory glint in Sasuke's usually lifeless eyes, a small moan leaving his mouth as he felt the dark haired teen grind their lower regions together creating a blissfully agonizing friction against his growing problem.

Sasuke leaned down close to Naruto's ear, his hot breath earning a violent shudder from the entrapped blond; his trademark smirk fell into its rightful place before he whispered huskily, "By the way dobe, _I'm_ seme."


End file.
